I’m just a bit stressed lately. Last night (Tues) that would have been a complete understatement. [Much abridged.]
I had been working on a lengthy post, which I just cut all but the 1st sentence from, on how sucky my life has been the last week or so. I was chatting with one of my LEEP buddies during class Wednesday night and had told her I had this lengthy post that I was working on concerning all my recent trials and travails. But, honestly, no one cares, nor should they probably.
Things are slowly getting better. Some of the issues have been resolved, some I’m learning (or trying) to live with.
Lately, it’s been customer service support hell for me. Not in the giving, but the receiving. I have a credit card that I recently transferred large sums of debt to that managed not to change my address, then sent me a bill that I received 2 weeks after it was due. Now when I am trying to resolve the issues they are acting like they don’t know who I am and I have to wait for their security department to call me. That’s kind of hard when I work or go to school most of the day!
ZoneAlarm really screwed me over when I tried to update my subscription for the next year due to completely inept error messages in their shopping cart. In the meantime, they managed to encumber my debit card for over $240 for a charge of $31.82!
Thus, I started getting overdraft statements from my credit union on Tuesday. But the system did not show the encumbrance and it simply looked as if they just started “stealing” money from me, to the eventual tune of $110. I got that one worked out yesterday thanks to a very helpful Connie (and Jennifer the day before).
Those are just the tip of the iceberg that has drifted (crashed?) into my life at the moment. But, it has to get better.
I’m enjoying serials cataloging, although mentally it is like taking a 4th class.
I’m also assisting in getting our student group, ACRL@UIUC, up and running for the new year. Our 1st meeting of the semester is next Wed., so those responsibilities will settle down soon. Unfortunately, I am working at that time and can’t attend.
I was having WordPress issues for a while so I asked Richard Urban who told me to contact Blake. He had had the same problem with the Musematic blog before and Blake fixed it. So despite all the badness settling on me hard on Tuesday evening, Blake did me a world of good and had me fixed in under 2 hours from when I sent my email to LISHost.
So, thanks to people like Connie, Jennifer and Blake, things are beginning to look up.
One last person I’d like to thank is the Feel-good Librarian. Tuesday night while my world seemed to be crashing around me I was steadfastly refusing to cry or scream. I tried to distract myself for a bit and looked at a few things in my Bloglines. That post finally made me cry. Not for me, but for that mother and her daughter, and for all the other people in the world who do not feel safe for serious and justified reasons. I may have, or think I have, lots of problems in this world, but I do feel safe.
6 responses so far ↓
1 Jenica // Sep 1, 2006 at 10:55 am
Bravo for trying hard and consciously to shift your mental perceptions of your life. I find (and I’m not implying this is true of you, only of me) that I often get caught in wallowing in my own unhappiness, and that if I just say “Life is NOT THAT BAD” rather than cataloging (and indexing!) the ways in which my life sucks, I feel better. And life isn’t that bad, after all, and the crises I’m managing get more manageable.
So here’s to manageable crises, and to feeling like life’s an okay place!
2 Mark // Sep 1, 2006 at 11:36 am
Thanks for the support Jenica! It did start out as a sort of catalog, but I wanted it to read better and didn’t have the time or energy to craft a decent story. And that was just another stressor!
Then I realized that it was silly/stupid of me to try and craft a story just to elicit sympathy for myself. We all have our own issues.
In the end, I still wrote a bit about the financial issues. But there is a lot more from all aspects of my life that are needling me right now. Some of those are improving too, so I am grateful.
The tactic you mention is one I have been working on for a while now. With good role models like yourself (and yes, this aspect of you does come through on your blog), I am able to learn it even quicker.
I appreciate the “not implying,” but you hit the nail on the head.
I used to be an expert at that, and am still fairly good at it. I used to intentionally wallow so as to reach the bottom quicker so as to come back up quicker. Maybe it worked. Who knows? I’ve tried to get better at what you suggest, because whether my earlier tactic worked or not, it can’t really be very healthy.
My life is OK, and in some moments even pretty darn tasty! I have chosen to do what I’m doing, so I need to abide the things I have no control over and try and change the things I can. Sounds like that trite (imho) “prayer,” but there is a bit of wisdom in it. I doubt that I will ever be serene, but I can at least work towards it.
Thanks again for the support Jenica!
Please say Hi to Rudy for me. I wish I had gotten a chance to talk with her more after the movie last Sunday.
3 Lisa // Sep 2, 2006 at 8:19 pm
Hey
thank you for all your thoughtful conversation…and letting me (us..those who read your blog) into your space, if only just a glimpse. Bad days, yucky things…they happen…but are not necessarily indicative of who we are-our strengths and capabilities. Just because it is hard doesn’t mean it can’t be done…
I have faith in your resilience.
Leeper Lisa
4 jessamyn // Sep 2, 2006 at 10:03 pm
feel free to ping me if you’re having Wordpress issues that may not be Blake related. I can fix an awful lot of stuff, and I know what it’s like to feel super frazzled AND have your blog be all ferblundjett. Here’s hoping September is a vast improvement for you!
5 Mark // Sep 5, 2006 at 8:07 am
Thanks Lisa! I’m not sure I have faith in it, but over the last few years I’ve learned that I have it and how to rely on it even quicker. I’d call that progress.
Thanks Jessamyn! I just might, but I hate to bug you with things I “should” be able to figure out. Most are things I’d like to add/change, i.e. contact form, some stuff on the right sidebar,…. So, when I get a second, I’ll check out your posts, the replies, and your plugin page to see what you did regarding a contact form.
There is one or two other “broken” things I may just ping you ’bout, though. Thanks!
6 sarah // Sep 9, 2006 at 4:29 pm
Does it make you wonder what FGL’s life is like? Like what bills is she paying right now? Where does she fall down? We are all blessed and cursed by our lives in the western world, making it alone or with someone, so many things become a struggle.
Tragedies like described by fgl, and train wrecks that we come upon help us put our stuff in perspective, but it is our stuff, and i am grateful for it. We are alive for such a short time, even when it feels like forever. Oops, got bills to pay darn it…
sarah